The Competition

As I've mentioned before, there is a startling lack of hotel options in my neighborhood. Today I would like to take the opportunity to make that very clear by presenting your current hotel choices.

First, as all good researchers must do, I'll define some terms.

My Neighborhood - I'm referring to the glorious chunk of Los Angeles that is east of Vermont Ave., north of Sunset Blvd. (with some exceptions like Echo Lake), west of Dodger Stadium and south of Riverside Dr. Many will call this Los Feliz, Silver Lake and Echo Park although my borders don't include the entirety of those neighborhoods.

Hotel - Hotels, motels and guest houses.

1. Olive Motel

Photo: Yelp

This place looks awesome in a sad, Midnight Train to Georgia sort of way. The location is ideal, right in the middle of Sunset Junction, but the Olive Motel concerns me. It costs $49 a night, which I guess is an attribute, but you can't make reservations . My favorite quote from a Yelp review is, "I found a friggin crack pipe under the bed that apparently was not cleaned up from the person before."

2. Comfort Inn

Photo: Comfort Inn

I'm sure this hotel is fine. It's like the Sizzler of hotels. It's the kind of place that is perfect when you're in town for week to move your old grandmother out of her house and into a nursing home. Not really a vacation destination, but it probably does the job. The best part is that it's only a block away from the iconic rotating Happy/Sad foot.

3. Super 8 Motel

Photo: Super 8 Motel

This Echo Park motel is extremely close to Dodger Stadium. This is why people stay there. It gets 2.5 stars on Yelp with various different complaints of ants, cigarette stains on sheets, urine smell, etc.

4. Baxter 5

Photo: Baxter 5

This is a series of guest houses and apartments in Echo Park. The website features some appealing photos but go read the reviews on Yelp. Actually, why don't I just give you a taste:

"First, my room was not ready until 8:00 pm, Later I found a large dark hair ball on the whitish bedspread, wrinkled faded black sheets with a hard, thin mattress, and both pillow covers with large stains. Closets were stuffed haphazardly with boxes, bags and god-knows what. The entire room smelled sickly sweet like they were trying to get rid of an even worse smell. "

And now for the real competition...

5. Los Feliz Lodge

Photo: Los Feliz Lodge

When I've asked people where their friends and family come to stay in my neighborhood, this is the place they mention. Four really cute bungalows in Los Feliz for short or long term rental with nice design sense and reasonable prices. I would definitely stay here.

6. El Tres Inn

Photo: Apartment Therapy

This small inn, featuring 3 suites (as in, El Tres), is above El Chavo Restaurant in Sunset Junction. The people who've stayed there love it and it looks pretty cool with it's kitschy Mexican vibe. It's the only real boutique inn in the hood and if I had a hotel, it would be friends with El Tres. More photos on Apartment Therapy.

The End.

In summation, your options for hotels in my neighborhood are as follows: 2 extremely shady motels where you may or may not contract Hepatitis C, 1 mediocre Comfort Inn, a series of frightening guest houses, and a grand total of 7 suites/bungalows worth spending your money on. Yep, that's it. 7.

Did you know that my neighborhood has more restaurants and boutiques than most mid-size cities in America? I'm just saying. Maybe it's time for a proper hotel, guys.

Oh no, looks like someone is beating me to the punch. Damn it!